beta request

Anyone willing to look over ~3,000 words of het needle play fic? It's Hathaway/Hobson from Lewis, but no knowledge of the series is required. The needle play is described in fairly graphic detail but there is very little sexual content in the traditional sense. Oh, and it's the lady in question who's in charge, in case that entices any femdom fans? I really just want a grammar/flow check, please?

Thank you!