This was excellent fic - well worth the wait after part one! *grins*
Your style is easily readable, and you have a gift for metaphor and simile that would perplex the Guv but make Sam proud:
Ray’s hands were digging into the vulnerable skin of his back and Chris imagined bruises that would bloom there tomorrow, black and purple flowers of lust.
and my favourite...
Shards of thoughts kept falling around him like broken glass in a bar fight
Beautiful!
And as for the content - I love the fact that you have Chris struggling with his inner conflict about Sam and Ray all the way through - that even when he's ooc at the end he still can't choose. And poor Ray! (Yep, you've even made me feel sorry for the character I hate the most)- cos he realises that he still hasn't won after all.
Major, major kudos for this. I will wait patiently for many months only pleeeeeease consider writing a third part!
no subject
on 2006-05-12 04:47 pm (UTC)Your style is easily readable, and you have a gift for metaphor and simile that would perplex the Guv but make Sam proud:
Ray’s hands were digging into the vulnerable skin of his back and Chris imagined bruises that would bloom there tomorrow, black and purple flowers of lust.
and my favourite...
Shards of thoughts kept falling around him like broken glass in a bar fight
Beautiful!
And as for the content - I love the fact that you have Chris struggling with his inner conflict about Sam and Ray all the way through - that even when he's ooc at the end he still can't choose. And poor Ray! (Yep, you've even made me feel sorry for the character I hate the most)- cos he realises that he still hasn't won after all.
Major, major kudos for this. I will wait patiently for many months only pleeeeeease consider writing a third part!
:-)