kat_lair | A Bandom Gets Spanked Meme

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A Bandom Gets Spanked Meme

So, I’ve been whinging about this to a couple people (

sateenmusta have been most sympathetic), but there really should be more spanking fic in Bandom. I have the craving, okay? And sometimes you just have to be proactive about these things. So with that flimsy excuse, I present…

Smack Your Bitch Up – A Bandom Gets Spanked Meme

Comment-fic, speculation, random perving and photo essays about the most spankable ass in Bandom all welcome. Anon-commenting is enabled and IP tracking off, in case someone wants to letch anonymously. All pairings and all ratings, just please provide both in the subject line. Also, feel free to pimp widely.

Get to it. Over my knee, bitch. Now.

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yeah, that works like woah. I think in particular it works for me because Gerard is all over with the body image issues and his high need to show no skin whatsoever and so i think a domme would get that, would be able to disassemble it in an cathartic way rather than exploitive one. Like where I see Patrick going in this comment fic. The thread makes me rethink my earlier contention, because Patrick is working within the emotional mind field of Gerard's body image issues and it is powerful and cunning and brilliant. So women, and gender queer folk and Patrick. And playing out that logic to other bandom folks that I associate with body image stuff - probably Bob and Spencer.

Jon is tricky in the top department, I'm not gonna lie. Because bottoms like Jon, I mean the one in particular I think of that I associate with Jon's "type" have literally done it all. They've been around so long, have had opportunities to perfect submission in the many and varied manifestations that exist, carefully cultivated a submissive response that is dynamic, changing to suit the course of the current situation. Maybe it's that IDK they have surrendered to the scene itself, and the top is in some way just a conduit of the power exchange. You know?
In thinking about your points, I agree that he isn't a high maintenance bottom, and Spencer is a good fit. One because I adore all things Spencer Smith and his exquisite natural dominance, and two because I like to believe in the canon in my head that Spencer has had a great deal of practice with the skittish genius that is Ryan Ross negotiating when to push and when to pull back.

Ditto on the Brendon mattering piece. It made me think of a drabble - I'm a very inexperienced as a writer of stories, haven't cultivated that skillset at all, but I can see Brendon's defining moment, he's the youngest of a large family and maybe around 5 or 6 he's doing what he always does which is to tag around with the older kids and their friends trying to win some attention, and they are maybe playing wiffleball or kickball or something, it's a fierce game of interfamily/inter neighborhood rivalry per usual, but Brendon has been teasing and nagging mercilessly all day to be able to take his turn at bat. So his oldest sibling says yeah, okay, you're next and when he gets up there all proud and preening and just ready, the pitcher raises an eyebrow at his brother, and Brendon turns and sees him shake his head and say, "don't worry, he doesn't c-o-u-n-t" and the air shifts and changes. Brendon doesn't understand why, he can't spell yet, but the others nod or laugh, and suddenly it doesn't feel the same. There's something empty about this moment. So he takes his turn, but the proud feeling is gone and he doesn't know why. He carefully repeats what was said so he can remember, and goes home and asks his mom what c-o-u-n-t spells and she explains, and he spends the rest of the next few decades trying to recover, reclaim that moment, feel necessary. Like he does matter.

Ryan... that boy has some serious power/control issues. Uh, yeah. The way he dresses? The total production of his outfits scream out to the fetish niche in the scene. They'd welcome him with open arms. Costume does dictate the character in some important ways, and f**k we could do a series of analyses on Ryan's fashion choices. The part that makes me go, hunh, is how he negotiates real life in character, like, asserts his right to choose who he wants to be on any given day, even though it might be taboo, say, or inconsistent with who he was yesterday. I have other theories on this, but woh, I've been going on here and at some point I have to go make dinner.

love this conversation. love it.

I just posted a picsapm that sorta chronicalled Ryan's fashion timeline. And I knew that there had to be a psychological progression in it for him, but an analysis of something like that would be awesome.

Okay, firstly: Gerard and his body image issues. To be honest, that's something I wasn't (at least not consciously) thinking about at all, but fuck if fits really well and I may now introduce some of those elements into it. For me the whole "tell Pete what it feels like" part was about vocalisation. I have a thing about... well, not "dirty talk" per se (although sure, that's definitely part of it) but having people/characters put their feelings and thoughts into words. Doing that makes them real, unavoidable, undeniable. Once you've said something out loud, it's much more difficult to push away after, and I think the emotions evoked during a power exchange such as spanking should be confronted and verbalised in order to accept them. And of course, it's about stripping someone naked in a way that goes beyond clothes and skin and body image... IDK, part of me thinks I've put it better in the comment fic to which I've added more now, a lot of it owing to what we've been talking.

Jon - What you say here is absolutely fascinating. Especially this They've been around so long, have had opportunities to perfect submission in the many and varied manifestations that exist, carefully cultivated a submissive response that is dynamic, changing to suit the course of the current situation. Maybe it's that IDK they have surrendered to the scene itself, and the top is in some way just a conduit of the power exchange. - but at the same time I find it immensely sad, because what is missing here is the personal connection, the intimacy that should exist between the people involved. Intellectually I can see the spirituality of it, surrendering to the scene as you so aptly put it. But emotionally... I can't help but feel that it's also an awfully cold and lonely place to be. It makes me wonder about Jon, how he has managed to separate what he is from who he is to the degree that if the top is nothing more than the conduit, then Jon himself is nothing more than the vessel of the power exchange. It almost makes me weep for him.

I love that snippet of Brendon's childhood and I would totally encourage you to write it up as a ficlet. Or if you really don't want to, maybe you'd let me have a go? I'd give full credit to you for the concept and idea.

Ryan - I would, love love love an analysis of his wardrobe through this prism of power/control/privacy we've discussed here. Will definitely go and look at

magdalyna's picspam... And this he negotiates real life in character, like, asserts his right to choose who he wants to be on any given day, even though it might be taboo, say, or inconsistent with who he was yesterday. is so very spot-on, echoing deeply what I said earlier about how it's obvious that he always holds a part of himself back in the public eye. It's a role he's playing, sure, but that doesn't make it a lie or made-up, just a carefully revealed sliver of his whole self that he allows to be seen when needed. More than anyone else in that band (and the whole FBR/DD group) Ryan knows the value of disguises, of distraction. That boy has layers and to have them peeled back, to watch him either surrender control/power or fucking own it (and I maintain that he would be capable of both), would be something else.

Okay, wow, I seem to have gone on and on again. This meme has completely blown me away. I never imagined such a wonderful response, all this fic, not to mention the conversations I'm having with people... Like this one I'm having with you: full of fascinating insight and omg, so wonderful to talk about these things with someone who knows their shit. Absolutely love it.

It surprises me that you weren't consciously thinking of G's body image stuff, because that is part of the comment fic that sticks out for me, how Gerard just wants to run and hide and the shame. then again, your intent? the whole "tell Pete what it feels like" part was about vocalisation. OF COURSE. I'm vibing so hard on your assertion about making it real, undeniable. God, yes, there is something so intense about being accountable in the moment to the covenant of the exchange. Saying aloud, this isn't being done to me, without my consent, it's what I knowingly and willingly embark upon, not necessarily because I can predict the outcome or the pathway, (that to me is like topping from the bottom, and oh, what a pale imitation that is) but because I have agency and dignity and with those intact I make an informed choice to relinquish myself to another's will. Yielding during sex, that's. that can be about physical release, an escape if you will. it's pleasurable, yes, and necessary and under certain circumstances, great, especially in a cultural context that is fucking uptight about the body. But, surrender is more than just release, more than just succumbing to a primal urge, it can be transcendent, because release/escape isn't the end, it's a path towards a deeper, more thorough connection.

That being said, Jon. And I should back up and say, I'm not sure, maybe I played out too far the similarities I see between Jon being committed to a, idk punk or rock scene and my canon bottom Jon being committed to the bdsm one. Because I look at how Jon immersed himself in the former, not maybe finding the perfect niche, but carving one out nonetheless, through trial and error and it was all necessary, a part of the journey, one that allowed for experimentation and learning and mistakes, but that he didn't have to internalize when a particular band didn't work out or "make it" because who he is, his identity within that context wasn't reliant upon a particular band taking him in and making him complete. Not to say that one (band) didn't surface eventually that could make use of all that he learned and bring him a connection, a relationship, a sense of completion that he doesn't necessarily depend upon, not in the codependent way, but nonetheless, heightens the experience, gives it richness and texture and belonging. Which I feel I could make an argument about, that is what he found in Panic.

IDK, I'm not a romantic maybe in the traditional western european definition, I think, believing there is this one person who will complete you so much as that there are an infinite number of ways to define complete and what is romantic as hell is when you make a decision, a commitment everyday to a particular relationship, opening yourself up to a kind of soul-deep rendering of unity-seeking in concert with an other(s). If that makes any sense.

Dude, I cannot write the Brendon piece, alas, my storytelling skills are firmly esconsed in oral traditions and the transition to writing is WAY awkward, but I am just BEAMING at the thought that you'd consider a stab at it, so feel free. For serious.

And as for the Ryan fashion analysis, I saw the picspam and it's brilliant and I SO want to do that, though I'd think it would be better worked up collaboratively. I do better with prompts - love for instance to kick it around with you if you are interested, when we both have the time to give attention to it, do it up properly, because that would be just. on ten.

And, this meme? and I mean our dialogue is just a small, though awesome, part of it. It's totally bringing me the happy. Thank you.

I have no idea what you mean about not being a writer when you put things so elegantly. being accountable in the moment to the covenant of the exchange - just. Yes. accountable resonates so strongly with me. It's the hardest past of a D/s dynamic, and the most rewarding. To admit that I want this, want to either be stripped bare and taken over, or want to tear someone open, gently but irrevocably, to take everything they give and then take some more.

I'm jumping ahead a bit, but this release/escape isn't the end, it's a path towards a deeper, more thorough connection. to me ties to what I was saying about the importance of the human connection. I agree with you about that the connection doesn't need to be the traditional monogamous two-person pairing. We form different kinds and overlapping connections with people throughout our lives and I don't believe in the kind of sequential monogamy the Western culture presupposes _{(though saying that I also tend to be pretty possessive... *shrugs* mea culpa, I'm working on it)}. So what is important to me is not so much the exact nature of the connection or the number of people you have it with, but that it's there. We, as human beings, are messy and imperfect. We hurt each other, deliberately and without meaning to, we fuck and we love and we laugh and wipe snotty noses on our sleeves. We're gorgeous and disgusting and everything in between, spirit and flesh, and I could never separate one from other, because apart both will wither and die. That's what I meant about the necessity of intimacy and I kind of want to quote your whole paragraph about Jon because Not to say that one (band) didn't surface eventually that could make use of all that he learned and bring him a connection, a relationship, a sense of completion that he doesn't necessarily depend upon, not in the codependent way, but nonetheless, heightens the experience, gives it richness and texture and belonging. Which I feel I could make an argument about, that is what he found in Panic. just a world of yes there.

I would love to have a stab of writing a little kid!Brendon ficlet for you :) I shall play with the concept over the next few days and see what I can come up with.

Ditto to the analysing Ryan's wardrobe; would love to do something lie that with you. The picspam is a good starting point, but there are hundreds of other pictures of Ryan that I thin would work so incredibly well as examples too. The one that comes to mind immediately is his leather-twink pose here:

(http://s112.photobucket.com/albums/n163/kat_lair/Panic%20At%20The%20Disco/?action=view&current=hand_114.jpg)

Seriously, idek where to start with that one *hands* His body language. _{incidentally, sateenmusta wrote some fic loosely based on this picture that you might enjoy. Too Good To Hurt. (http://sateenmusta.livejournal.com/63147.html) Features top!Brendon, which I can also get behind as I basically see both him and Ryan as switches.}

Anyway, I have some panic pics in my photobucket gallery here (http://s112.photobucket.com/albums/n163/kat_lair/Panic%20At%20The%20Disco/) that you might want to browse. Also the recent epic Panic flail post (http://users.livejournal.com/nepenthe_/1107365.html) had a lot of photos I haven't seen before. I think the first stage might be to collect a handful of good examples, quality over quantity is the key here I think if we're going for in-depth analysis rather than yet another picspam.

This is one of the best conversations about BDSM I've ever had with anyone. It's making me think and more than that, it's making me articulate things that are usually only intuitively understood. That's awesome. Thank you, right back :)

Thank you, you make me blush, I'll maintain, though, that I name things better than weave a narrative. It's the hardest past of a D/s dynamic, and the most rewarding. To admit that I want this, want to either be stripped bare and taken over, or want to tear someone open, gently but irrevocably, to take everything they give and then take some more. Guh. One of the ways that I know I'm an irredeemable bottom is that the idea of being stripped bare and taken over is enough to transport me to a state of reverence but, oh, how I live in awe, and not a little worship, of the person who seeks to irrevocably tear me open, gentle or not. With precision or brutishness. Fuck. That is. Fuck.

I love admire adore your point about the messy and imperfect, brutal beauty of spirit and flesh entwined in the vulgar delights of the mundane as well as the more profane ecstasies available to our imaginations. You're right, it's the whole that works. That's why I love the scene, because it doesn't try to purify those pursuits deemed vulgar, doesn't seek to erase what is considered transgressive, knows that there is enlightenment be found where one revels in the full spectrum of what the body is capable of enduring, embracingif the spirit is willing.

oh, and lest I forget, would love to have a stab of writing a little kid!Brendon ficlet for you *pleads prettily*

Oh the picture above, I think I maybe died a little. His fingers. Long and sleek and bent in supplication. I browsed through your pics, and am feeling inspired. I vote that one, and the aubergine suit with the ridiculous oversized satin bowtie and, absolutely the foursplit frame with the half-striped vest and pinstriped pants in the corridor. His pose. Dandy Ryan is one of my favorites, especially the hip tilt, cane-leaning example. I'm traveling for work again in the next two days, but if it's okay I'll start an email thread soon after to discuss a starter set of quality pics.

Ditto on this being one of the best bdsm conversations I've ever been involved in, excavating what is intuitively understood? when it's bleeding hot and profound? THAT'S WHAT'S UP

Yes to pretty much everything.

I was just about to suggest we move this conversation to email, partly because it's getting long and cumbersome on LJ, partly because it's also getting somewhat personal. My address: kat_lair@hotmail.com So yes, feel free to email about the photos etc. there and we'll see what kind of tinhatty analysis of Ryan's wardrobe we can come up with *gg*

I'm going away for a long weekend, so I'll be offline from Fri to late Monday. However, I will hopefully spend the bus journey writing the kid!Brendon ficlet... (and listening to Pretty. Odd. Yep, still haven't gotten to around to it...)

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