I for one, have enjoyed reading this, thank you for your hard work!
Seeing inside people brains when they're writing fic is more than interesting, even seeing that conflict at the 'well I think that's erotic, will other people?' moment. Which I'm fairly certain we've all had. I totally agree about transitions though, the moving a whole scene, complete with emotional content, can sometimes sound and feel awkward. Until you have to poke at it, and edit it and fuss about with it enough to make you feel like you might go mad.
But it is fun to spot things in your commentary that are really familiar, especially when it comes to what you want the characters to do conflicting with what you think they 'actually' would do. Which tends to drift around the sex scene rather more than random dialogue or action parts.
Sometimes the things you think will work, the things which you want to happen...just won't, because the character gets all caught up on something completely different or it just doesn't fit without jarring you out of whatever you're writing. You mention something like that happening twice above. Once you go your way in the story and once you let him go his and I loved noticing that.
On one of your points though I agree with claudia_writes, I also saw the allusion to cock-sucking experience as some sort of wishful thinking/justification for his own intentions.
no subject
Seeing inside people brains when they're writing fic is more than interesting, even seeing that conflict at the 'well I think that's erotic, will other people?' moment. Which I'm fairly certain we've all had. I totally agree about transitions though, the moving a whole scene, complete with emotional content, can sometimes sound and feel awkward. Until you have to poke at it, and edit it and fuss about with it enough to make you feel like you might go mad.
But it is fun to spot things in your commentary that are really familiar, especially when it comes to what you want the characters to do conflicting with what you think they 'actually' would do. Which tends to drift around the sex scene rather more than random dialogue or action parts.
Sometimes the things you think will work, the things which you want to happen...just won't, because the character gets all caught up on something completely different or it just doesn't fit without jarring you out of whatever you're writing. You mention something like that happening twice above. Once you go your way in the story and once you let him go his and I loved noticing that.
On one of your points though I agree with claudia_writes, I also saw the allusion to cock-sucking experience as some sort of wishful thinking/justification for his own intentions.