It surprises me that you weren't consciously thinking of G's body image stuff, because that is part of the comment fic that sticks out for me, how Gerard just wants to run and hide and the shame. then again, your intent? the whole "tell Pete what it feels like" part was about vocalisation. OF COURSE. I'm vibing so hard on your assertion about making it real, undeniable. God, yes, there is something so intense about being accountable in the moment to the covenant of the exchange. Saying aloud, this isn't being done to me, without my consent, it's what I knowingly and willingly embark upon, not necessarily because I can predict the outcome or the pathway, (that to me is like topping from the bottom, and oh, what a pale imitation that is) but because I have agency and dignity and with those intact I make an informed choice to relinquish myself to another's will. Yielding during sex, that's. that can be about physical release, an escape if you will. it's pleasurable, yes, and necessary and under certain circumstances, great, especially in a cultural context that is fucking uptight about the body. But, surrender is more than just release, more than just succumbing to a primal urge, it can be transcendent, because release/escape isn't the end, it's a path towards a deeper, more thorough connection.
That being said, Jon. And I should back up and say, I'm not sure, maybe I played out too far the similarities I see between Jon being committed to a, idk punk or rock scene and my canon bottom Jon being committed to the bdsm one. Because I look at how Jon immersed himself in the former, not maybe finding the perfect niche, but carving one out nonetheless, through trial and error and it was all necessary, a part of the journey, one that allowed for experimentation and learning and mistakes, but that he didn't have to internalize when a particular band didn't work out or "make it" because who he is, his identity within that context wasn't reliant upon a particular band taking him in and making him complete. Not to say that one (band) didn't surface eventually that could make use of all that he learned and bring him a connection, a relationship, a sense of completion that he doesn't necessarily depend upon, not in the codependent way, but nonetheless, heightens the experience, gives it richness and texture and belonging. Which I feel I could make an argument about, that is what he found in Panic.
IDK, I'm not a romantic maybe in the traditional western european definition, I think, believing there is this one person who will complete you so much as that there are an infinite number of ways to define complete and what is romantic as hell is when you make a decision, a commitment everyday to a particular relationship, opening yourself up to a kind of soul-deep rendering of unity-seeking in concert with an other(s). If that makes any sense.
Dude, I cannot write the Brendon piece, alas, my storytelling skills are firmly esconsed in oral traditions and the transition to writing is WAY awkward, but I am just BEAMING at the thought that you'd consider a stab at it, so feel free. For serious.
And as for the Ryan fashion analysis, I saw the picspam and it's brilliant and I SO want to do that, though I'd think it would be better worked up collaboratively. I do better with prompts - love for instance to kick it around with you if you are interested, when we both have the time to give attention to it, do it up properly, because that would be just. on ten.
And, this meme? and I mean our dialogue is just a small, though awesome, part of it. It's totally bringing me the happy. Thank you.
Re: comment fic
That being said, Jon. And I should back up and say, I'm not sure, maybe I played out too far the similarities I see between Jon being committed to a, idk punk or rock scene and my canon bottom Jon being committed to the bdsm one. Because I look at how Jon immersed himself in the former, not maybe finding the perfect niche, but carving one out nonetheless, through trial and error and it was all necessary, a part of the journey, one that allowed for experimentation and learning and mistakes, but that he didn't have to internalize when a particular band didn't work out or "make it" because who he is, his identity within that context wasn't reliant upon a particular band taking him in and making him complete. Not to say that one (band) didn't surface eventually that could make use of all that he learned and bring him a connection, a relationship, a sense of completion that he doesn't necessarily depend upon, not in the codependent way, but nonetheless, heightens the experience, gives it richness and texture and belonging. Which I feel I could make an argument about, that is what he found in Panic.
IDK, I'm not a romantic maybe in the traditional western european definition, I think, believing there is this one person who will complete you so much as that there are an infinite number of ways to define complete and what is romantic as hell is when you make a decision, a commitment everyday to a particular relationship, opening yourself up to a kind of soul-deep rendering of unity-seeking in concert with an other(s). If that makes any sense.
Dude, I cannot write the Brendon piece, alas, my storytelling skills are firmly esconsed in oral traditions and the transition to writing is WAY awkward, but I am just BEAMING at the thought that you'd consider a stab at it, so feel free. For serious.
And as for the Ryan fashion analysis, I saw the picspam and it's brilliant and I SO want to do that, though I'd think it would be better worked up collaboratively. I do better with prompts - love for instance to kick it around with you if you are interested, when we both have the time to give attention to it, do it up properly, because that would be just. on ten.
And, this meme? and I mean our dialogue is just a small, though awesome, part of it. It's totally bringing me the happy. Thank you.